How to know if you’re in the friendzone.
The odd thing about the Friendzone is that the more you try to stay away from it, the more it draws you in. It’s like though you’ve sunk into quicksand. The harder you try, the quicker you’ll sink.
People that are able to get out of quicksand effectively are calm. They keep their calm. They aren’t frightened in the least.
The Friendzone is emotional treacherous terrain.
In the Friendzone, you’re bending over backward for her, treating her like a queen, and making her your first priority. She goes out into the sunset and into a bright new future with a man who clearly doesn’t deserve her at the end of the day. Because she is so unique, she deserves only the finest. What a way to have your heart broken.
Taking off your rose-colored glasses and not making that extra special lady in your life a particular priority is one of the greatest strategies to avoid the Friendzone.
If you think all of the above, you’ve elevated her to a status that you believe you’ll never achieve.
Have you ever observed how ignoring a cat causes it to approach you and rub its tail in your face? If you are exceptionally friendly to the cat, on the other hand, it will turn its nose up at you as it goes by, as if you don’t exist.
When it comes to women, the similar dynamic exists.
When you place a woman on a pedestal, you are signaling to her that she is superior to you, that you are not her equal, and that there will never be a love connection between you.
Who wants to be with someone who treats them as second-class citizens and caters to their every whim? It may seem appealing and romantic at first, but reality will soon set in: people are drawn to challenges.
People yearn for what they can’t have and take for granted what they already have. It’s cliched and overused, but it’s perfect for the Friendzone and placing women on pedestals. If you offer too much and make yourself too accessible to a woman, she will be turned off and instantly put you in the friend category — it’s simply not what she wants in a love companion.
If you don’t want to wind up in the Friendzone, treat her like you would your buddies. Don’t treat her any differently than you would a regular buddy.
Make sure she doesn’t get the impression that you’re putting your life on wait simply for her. Don’t sacrifice everything else in your life simply for her. If you wouldn’t bend over backward for your other pals, don’t bend over backward for her.
You’re giving her a clear message when you do this. “You say,” you remark “You do not stand on a pedestal. I’m not going to deprive myself the opportunity to live a complete life simply to please you.” “
The Friendzone’s dilemma is that it’s a perplexing location where sexual and romantic desires are entwined with affection for friends. We all adore our pals. That is why we consider them to be our buddies. But it’s a love that’s entirely platonic.
Sadly, males in the Friendzone often place that wonderful lady on a pedestal when she is nothing more than a buddy. She simply sees you as a friend. Her feelings for you are those of a friend. Unfortunately, she is well aware that she is placed on that pedestal, and it is really flattering.
What’s the matter with this image? You’re like a court jester who will humiliate himself for her, elevate her, and make her feel amazing. You’d sever your heart to make her feel better about herself. All of this is wonderful for her, but you are still just a friend to her at the end of the day. Guess who is on the receiving end of the stick?
You wouldn’t place your pals on a pedestal, would you? Friendships are real because they are genuine. We receive so much from our friends because we fight back against them. We put them to the test, and they put us to the test. They keep us grounded.
You have a habit of making your pals weep.
You have a habit of hurting your pals.
Why? It’s because they treat you the same way they treat you. That is what distinguishes it as a human connection. That’s what keeps the connection firmly grounded on the ground.
This is what distinguishes genuine friendships from impostor connections. Fake friendships are doomed to fail. Fake friendships reach a point when they plateau.
These are friendships worth weeping over if you’re seeking for true friends who will help you explore your soul and make you a better person, people who will help you explore the broad and distant frontiers of existence.
Because you’re dealing with actual people, these are friendships worth being angry over.
People in real life aren’t always polite to one another. True friends aren’t always kind to one another. This is why putting somebody on a pedestal is a bad idea. You shouldn’t bind them emotionally with some kind of silken chain.
You are allowed to disregard them. Feel free to retaliate. Feel free to express your dissatisfaction.
Most importantly, you don’t go out of your way for your friends if they don’t go out of their way for you. You just don’t.
Finally, you are terrified of upsetting them or losing their friendship when you do this.
Stop bending over backward for your buddies if you feel like you are. You are not behaving in a friendly manner. You’re either setting yourself up to be Friendzoned by that particular girl whose heart you want to win, or you’re typecasting actual friends to become phony friends.